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Happy TurkeyDay DayWish

November 21, 2012
Michelle Obama, official White House portrait.

Michelle Obama, official White House portrait. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Hay Ya’awl,  

It’s Early, but it’ll fill up.  Ewe kin rest assured uv that!

Happy Thanksgiving to Ewe and Yours on our second favorite Holiday uv the year. Ya’awl already knowed 4th of JewelEye is our favorite, but this one’s right up thare and bahind, but actually some Vagabonds, why they’d put it right up thare in front and above. I sumtimes fergit Ewe’awl douw’nt knowed us nearly as well as we dew Ewes, and sum uv my friends keep ramindin me ta dew a bedder job of explaining us Vagabonds soes Ewe kin gitta knowed us on a more normally regular basis. Take this hare holiday fer instance……. 

When the Celebritees,
Fine White Plastic Linens, and
Turkey is gone.

Most uv Us Vagabonds call it TurkeyDay fer a couple reasons. Knot that we douw’nt appreciate all the extra Celebritee attentiun, fancy decoratiuns, fine white plastic linens, and reel fresh food that actually includes real turkey, we shore dew. Especiully when fouwks the likes uv Michelle Obama and her shy but purdee handsome husband bring those beautiful girls by ta help ouwt. We shore dew appreciate that evun moor! It’s jist the fact that really the only difference ta this day fer most us Vagabonds, is the real turkey. If the Celebritees take back all the fancy decoratiuns and fine white plastic linens which they usually dew when they leave us, which they always dew, it’s still the same old dining hall or souped ouwt kitchen, and dirty dishes we’re used to. Jist without the turkey. That’s really the reel reason. That and sumwhat what ewe’awl jist thunk is the obvious one, us Vagabonds douw’nt reely have that much, and shorely knot nearly enuf as ewe’awl dew ta be thankful for. That one we could continue to debate and argue over fer quite a few spells.

Thankful fer the Commraderie
Vagabondism provides

Sees, sum uv us Vagabonds is reel Greatful fer knot havin enuf uv all that. It’s what got a bunch uv my friends hare in the first place. Havin all that stuff tends ta make ya have ta dew moor and moore, which gives ya moore stress and less time ta injoy all the things ya douw’nt have. Purdee soon yer so stressed ouwt that ya start slippin and slidin off yer path and jist like my Vagabond Apprentice friend AirJordan jist dun did, purdee soon yer foot gits stuck in the storm drain. It douw’nt take long fer all that stuff ta float right by ya and down the drain if’n ewe gits stuck fer very long.   Sum uv us Vagabonds recognized that right away, and along time ago so instead jist avoided gittin enuf uv all that in the first place, jist in case our foot ever got stuck. And sum uv my friends got stuck fer so long and so far downstream from whare they usta be that everything includin their family, pets and friends also floated right by. Soes sum uv us is reel thankful, sum uv us isn’t and instead is reel blamin, and sum uv us jist douw’nt rightly give a damn. That’s why most uv us Vagabonds jist call it Turkeyday. It saves all uv us allot uv explainin. Now in a similar fashiun ta what sum uv Ewes are startin ta prepare for, the upcoming first Annual 4th of JewelEye Vagabond Holiday Switch, I’d like ta prapose a similar Vagabond Ted Idea worth spreadin’ fer TurkeyDay that would standardize the name for everyBody back ta Thanksgiving.

In anticipatiun uv the Holiday,
all the Cubby Holes are full.

What if, each uv Ewe ordinary people bafriended jist one Vagabond? I already told ya where ta jist look around ta find us, and jist like the 4th of JewelEye Vagabond Switch, ewe kin start off slow. Next time yer ouwt walkin around, reelly look at one uv my friends instead uv jist bein an ordinary no-glance passer by. Time after that try a reel actual hello when you walk by, and maybe evun a real smile. Why, the next time after that how bout using the ordinary greetin ya use when yer with yer friends or work associates, “Hello DARRRLing, how are you?” What if, after that, ya took it to the next step? Ya aisk my friend if Ewe kin buy him er her a cup uv coffee. What’s the nextWhat if, ya ask? Hell, throw in a bagel, or make it a lunch. Git ta know my friends the way I did and dew. An occasional earlee breakfast er lunch meetin, an occasional dollar er two, or evun an invite over fer a shave, clotheswash and shower (as long as the Missus Ordinary isn’t home. Whether it’s a guy er gal in yer shower these days,it tends ta look a bit suspicious ta the Missus). Once again, here’s where it gits challenging: What if, you git ta know jist one uv my Vagabond friends well enuf, you actually invite them over fer a weekend ta share your time with your family and friends? What if after that? They became your dog sitter or even your day care provider? What if, they became your house sitter when you’re travelling? What if, they became, YOUR FRIEND? Why, dew Ewe knot know whare this could lead??

Don’t worry, he’ll be up in time fer TurkeyDay Dinner.

If every sumbody got ta know jist one uv my friends, why purdee soon Vagabonds would be a hot commoditee and thare would’unt be noBodys left! Why, we’d create such a shortage thereby raisin the Vagabond Value so much we’d hafta start importin ’em jist liek we dun did with Iragi oil! Kin Ewe evun jist imagine???Now I know thare are sum reely challengin and extra speciul Vagabonds ouwt thare on the streets, but thare is also some extraordinary and extragifted people in yer society like that feller Oprah and his Doctor Phil who liek reel challenges, know whare the extraordinary places are that kin deel with reel challenges, and really know howta turn challenges inta jist ordinary everydays.  I mean jist look at Oprah and Dr Phil, they’re both now back on ordinary TV everyday! I guess that’s my Happy TurkeyDay DayWish, turnin TurkeyDay back inta Thanksgiving fer all uv us. Oh, dagnabitt!  I fergot ta explain what a DayWish is.  I’ll be reeeel quick.  Evun tho most Vagabonds have more than enough stars ta sleep under more than enuf nights, we learned long, long, ago that most dreams don’t come true if’n Ewe dew wish upon a star, evun if ya dew have sum uv that magical fairy dust ta sprinkle around bafore Ewe wish.  Sincen most uv us Vagabonds is tired of seein all those disappointin stars, we jist dew our Wishin during the Day.  It’s when sum uv Ewes will also maybe glance jist long enuf ta make our DayWish come true, and give us enuf spare change ta buy ourselves a hot cup of coffee.

Vagabond Ted
Some folk really take a good picture.  In remembrance of a very special friend and troubled Vagabond who’s life was  slowly sapped by those who feed on the simplicity of others, instead of building upon their character which is simply screaming for a little compassion.
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