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Shopping Cart History – prelude, part II

April 1, 2013

Hay Ya’awl,

I was preparing ta publish the next chapter in my personal Vagabond Autobabliographical trilogy of philosophical, virtual all cyberworld internet worldwide web Wanderings ,when I was hasten-ly stopped by real world PoPo-lice, the police!  The transgression yer mind is right now considerin ta ask???

Yup, it guessed it, far right!  This Vagabond got caught returnin his SuperMegaInconveinentWhatKnotStore’s shoppin cart tanite! There  I was, on my way back ta the SuperMegaInconveinentWhatKnotStore’s overflowed parkin lot from the two blocks where I hadta park my car in front of my house when I couldn’t find a spot ta park in that overflowed SuperMegaInconveinentWhatKnotStoreParkingLot, when that thare police car turned on his flashing lights, did his 180 on that rushed hour street, then turned on his siren to screech to a haul from the one block away from that abbr. store!

Now normally I woulda let a minor transgretiun like this fly right on below and beyond my need ta write abouwt it, had it not been fer jist walkin by one of my Vagabond friends temporary sleepin place, and findin the new “For Rent” sign, subliminally already super imposed over it, indicatin he finally got “accepted”.

For those of Ewe Homed that are feigning newly ignorant, thus unaware of the present day Vagabond (Homeless) Calamity,  “accepted” for a Vagabond means he won the SuperMegaImpossibleTaWinBall Lottery and jist got qualified for a section of a place he can call home,  referred to as an Eight.  Now don’t get me wrong, I’m as tickled pink as Klayton upload_100000da4531b2_2012-09-04021612519_7c571f4cwoulda been had someone called his Mom offerin her some work, that after two+ years his lottery number finally came up bafore his number was up.  I jist miss stoppin by and chattin abit at his place which is so convenient ta rest at when I’m returnin my cart ta the abbr. Store parkin lot.

So there I was, explaining to the police why I hadta park two blocks away from the abbr. store lot, which just happened ta be in front of my new non-Vagabond temporary until coalitionally underminded and pulled out from under me again home, wondering is this it?  Am I going to finally face my destiny and be arrested for being a Vagabond when I’m finally once again knot really a Vagabond?  Wa’ell this police guy was kinda green, and knot jist under the gills, soes when I pulled out my valid drivers license, with my valid address on it, which is within the 2 block radius of the Suburban Shingled, outer first ring that the SuperMegaInconveinentWhatKnotStore was plopped down next to bafore the city could rezone it and force the plop to at least be popularly appealed, and explaining why I parked there, he took on a reel green nodding look of disbalief, and let me go.

Soes instead of publishing the story I worked on all weekend ta publish, Im giving this current events report.  Here is the picture and advertisement for my buddy’s super Eight section lottery replaced place.  Now this place is purdee upscale for a Vagabond, offering central all atmospheric, year round seasonally impacted air conditioning 24×7, and wide open world wide web wifi, sky all around.  Why, couple that with the valet public transit curbside service station jist in front, and the temporary backup shelter with the section 8 waiting list porch overhangs just behind, and you have a reel nice year round spot ta sit and jist wait.

Newly Available!Highly desirable temporary location!

Newly Available!
Highly desirable temporary location!

So if’n Ewe’awl knowed anybody that may bea lookin for a premium temporary Vagabond place, drop me a comment hare or email me, and I’ll take ’em around and show ’em the place.  I could use another good friend to sit and talk to awhile, while I wait for the “surprise” coalitionally conspired eviction notice, forcing me to once again flee, from my temporary reprieve from Others’ Insanity place.

Vagabond Ted

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From → All, Homelessness

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